Depression: Breaking the silence

Khanyi Nzukuma, CEO of Metropolitan.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, it is estimated that by the year 2020 depression will be the second most common health problem in the world. Despite the statistics, there is still a stigma surrounding this illness – particularly in rural or underprivileged communities, – which means that many people who suffer with depression do not report it and therefore will not be treated. In light of this, Khanyi Nzukuma, Metropolitan CEO, calls for communities to break the silence around depression and start a new conversation towards a healthier awareness.

Why the stigma?

There seems to be a mysterious silence around depression as opposed to other illnesses – specifically in rural and underprivileged communities. In many cases depression is not seen as a “real” illness and people tend to make light of it, offering unhelpful advice like "Pull yourself together", or "Come on, life is not that bad!"

Another false perception is that depression is mostly brought about by circumstances or a traumatic experience, whereas depression can affect anyone in any life circumstance, regardless of race, class or gender.

Some traditional communities can also interpret depression as a form of "madness", which on its own carries a feeling of shame and abnormality, and discourages people from speaking out. In the community that I grew up in, there was one particular neighbour from down the road who was rumoured to be depressed. Most of his family and friends whispered behind his back: “He has gone crazy!” “The ‘mafufunyana’ has got the better of him!” What’s wrong with him?”

All of these false perceptions result in a general reluctance to discuss mental issues due to perceived prejudice. In short, people are suffering in silence because of a set of false beliefs, and this needs to be addressed in our communities.

How do we overcome this?

The best course of action to counter these false perceptions is education. Communities need to be made aware of the fact that depression is a biological illness, and just like diabetes or hypertension, requires treatment.

The reason people tend to find it difficult to place depression in the frame of a normal illness stems from the fact that it is not a tangible disease. It is not as easy as taking a blood test or a scan to determine its presence.

Because of the "intangibility factor", sometimes even those who are suffering with depression don’t even know it themselves, largely because they do not know what symptoms to look out for. Of course we all have down days once in a while or circumstance that make life hard or challenging for a season - a death in the family or a job loss. But some of the symptoms that people need to be aware of that could be an indication of depression are constant feelings of hopelessness and helplessness, a growing lackluster and losing an interest in activities that you used to enjoy, feeling constantly tired, and suffering with negative thoughts that seem out of your control.

Rather be safe than sorry. If these feelings are overwhelming you, speak to a friend or a counsellor so that you can be correctly diagnosed and - in the case that you have depression - to get the help that you need.

Break the silence

To those who are suffering with depression but are afraid of telling someone and talking about it: I believe vulnerability is strength.

Take Dumisani* for example, a friend I knew in university. I remember there was a time that Dumisani started acting strange and looking constantly detached, sad and tired. Outwardly his life was cool - he was a top student and had lots of friends. This made his change of behaviour even more confusing. From time to time - and I only learned this in retrospect - he even had thoughts of suicide. Secretly, Dumisani knew he was depressed and needed help but he lacked the confidence to speak out about it for fear that people would see him as weak. He felt ashamed. Eventually, after nearly a year of feeling that way, he started confiding in a close friend. Just talking about his depression and honestly sharing how he felt was like a heavy burden lifting off his shoulders. Dumisani also talked to some other close friends and family members about his illness and received mixed reactions - there were those who thought he was making his depression up or that he was literally going crazy, and that was very hurtful to him. But there were many people that were genuinely on his side. By breaking the silence he was able to find a counsellor and with the guidance of a doctor he started taking medication for his illness. It was not an easy journey but in the end his courage to speak out resulted in his road to recovery.

There is no shame in having an illness like depression. Talk to a counsellor or social worker in your community or a trusted friend or family member, and visit your local healthcare provider or clinic. Surround yourself with people that love you, and keep talking and communicating, even on your darkest days.

To those who have loved ones suffering with depression: The best thing you can do for your family/friends is to take them seriously and get proper diagnostic help. The second most important thing you can do is to offer your emotional support. Knowing that someone else cares about them can be very important.

*Not his real name